Today is Saturday … We have an EMERGENCY blog!

Well I’ve finally done it. I’ve hit a new all time low in life.

As most of you are aware I have health “issues”… which I try to take care of as best I can. Which, if done properly will enable me to live a normal, healthy life.

And as you know I’ve started back to school.

So Wednesday or so I notice a little twinge in my left elbow (now we all know I’m left handed) so I figured “ah I must have done something”, but like every other ache and pain you have you schlep it off and keep going.

Thursday, it was still there, still achy. By Friday afternoon I couldn’t straighten my arm or bend my arm, so walking around I’m looking a little Quasimodo’ish. Not pretty.

Let me tell you ONE important rule of life, when you hit 50, EVERYTHING is starting to fall south! Your face, eyelids, chin, arms, knee caps, thighs…EVERYTHING… so to compensate you MUST have very good posture and smile a lot! With good posture and a smile you can pull off being Sixty! People will walk by and comment to friends…”look at that poor old woman…but she looks happy!”

So I’m doing the Quasimodo shuffle, holding my arm up at this gawd awful angle, not moving my left shoulder to compensate the non-movement of my left arm. I’m thinking to myself “this isn’t getting better is it?’ and I said back to myself, “No...No it isn’t”, so we decided to take our sorry ass to the emergency medical clinic in town.

Now I’m not one to run to the doctors every five minutes. I really need to be pretty bad to get me to go. (must be some family trait) but I decided I should go when getting into the car I couldn’t close my door OR put my seat belt on. Luckily my housemate was there. We did look pretty regal, him running around the other side of the car to close it, then getting into the passenger seat, reached around and pull the shoulder belt around and clipped me in. And off we went.

Once arriving I immediately started with the “it’s not really an emergency” … “it’s really not that bad” but they took X-Rays and after checking them out, determined I have Bursitis, WHERE DID I GET THAT?

When I got home I did a little internal investigation. Where/What could I have possibly done? And then it came to me – writing. I’m in a sling for 3-4 days, I’ve been issued pain killers, I’m suppose to ice it, heat it, rest it, stationary for 3-4 days. All from taking notes! This is the only thing I’ve been doing differently, Note taking.

So now mothers, keep an eye on your children, school has started, they will be around, alcohol, drugs, sex, and notes!

I'm Baackk!!

Okay let me see if I can get this going… it’s been seven days since I’ve posted and I must have a lot to say…let’s see …um..

Oh yeah, have you ever read the book: O Pioneer? It’s actually a pretty good story. It takes place in 1873. Swedish families move to Nebraska and attempt to make a go of being successful farmers. After the death of the father, the mother, two brothers, some cows, a stallion, pigs and their crops, they finally become successful and rich. Okay that’s basically the whole story.

In the past four days I have written; not one, no… not two, but FOUR different essays on this book! FOUR! Now I remember why I hated English class in high school. How many ways can you analyze one book! So my brain is slightly fried! Our next two books are: Never Let Me Go (which is about to be released as a movie) and that all time high school favorite: Brave New World! I went to high school in the 70’s… I don’t remember much about high school, but I do remember I hated that book then, why are they trying to punish me now??

My other class is International Management. So far we’ve done four chapters and what I have learned is: Never go to Saudi Arabia. Did you know that if you are an American, British, or French, whatever, female and you visit this country, you cannot leave without a male’s permission? Yes that’s correct. You could be oh let’s say, Hillary Rodham-Clinton on a Secretary of State jaunt , you’re all packed and ready to leave but before you board the plane, someone at the airport will need to call Bill and ask if Hillary can get on the plane. How easy would it be for Bill to say “No”? If he did, she wouldn’t be allowed on the plane and her passport would be taken. Oh I’m sure the President would get involved and rescue her ass, but, still. So lesson #1 – Avoid Saudi Arabia.

Okay here’s some odd news…

A woman from a village in southwestern England says that a severe migraine attack left her speaking with what sounds like a French accent - a striking example of a rare syndrome that neuroscientists say can leave lifelong locals sounding like they come from thousands of miles away.

Can you imagine? You’re home getting dinner ready, folding laundry, kids are screaming in the background which leads to a headache and BOOM you have a Russian accent. Explain that to your friends. Of course they’d think you’re faking it. So if you go to Russia for six or seven months would you then pick up a British accent? Hmmm bet those scientists didn’t think of that!

And we have some sad new for us. Our town friend Amber M. died last week. She and her husband had fight on Monday night (over money probably…what else do people really fight about). On Tuesday she left for a scheduled dental appointment, checked into a local hotel, took a bottle of pills and she was found on Wednesday. She left her husband and two daughters, 21 and 18. I know this is sad but there is a reason I’m mentioning this to you…depression is running rampant in this country, the medicos so easily prescribe pills to make us feel better… which we then become addicted to. Call your friends, let them know you are there for them, check on an elderly person living two doors down that is alone…be a good neighbor…be a good person. Your one phone call may just change someone’s despondent mood and you’ve saved a life.

A New Day – A New Beginning (insert tweeting bird sounds here)

Today starts a new beginning for me, the start of college, for the second time. This go-around is to obtain my bachelors degree in Health Care Management.

Now before you start thinking to yourself what an altruistic person I am…let’s get some facts straight. I’m not. I’m not out to assist the world, I’m not out to assist mankind, help the needy and poor. (Although those are very good attributes, but they are not just for me) I’m out for the one and only person who is in need of my talents and that person is … Me!

Yes, the greed is starting to show through. I do this for one simple undeniable reason and that reason is: I’M GETTING TOO OLD TO BE LAID OFF ALL THE TIME!!

I’ve worked at some terrific places in my life. All Fortune 500 companies. All with great benefits, all companies that I’ve busted my butt for – and all have met their demise.

Digital Equipment Corporation – I was there 14 years! Crawled my way out of the warehouse, put up with people’s crap, worked my way up to MRPII Implementation Team Coordinator. Um sorry...lay off.

Standard Register Company – a mainstay in the printing world...I was there 11 years! Crawled my way out of order entry, put up with people’s crap, worked my way up to Inside Sales/Customer Service III. Um sorry…lay off.

Bayer Corporation… c’mon Bayer has been around since World War II!! I was there six years! Um sorry…closing the plant.

I can’t do this anymore!! I can’t keep changing jobs! I can’t keep starting a 401K I’m running out of time!

So I’ve chosen the Medical field. Obviously the more stable of businesses. There’s sickness and diseases all over the place. I don’t think President Obama has any plans for curing all diseases in the next few years... have you heard anything about that? (Let me know)

So you and I are on our new journey, let’s see where we go.

The Labor Day Special Edition!

The Labor Day Special Edition!

Ah…Labor Day. The crispness in the morning air, the celebration of families and friends with cookouts, boating, and swimming…get it all in before school starts, before the snow flies! But do you know how Labor Day started?

I refer to my old friend Wikipedia:

Labor Day is a United States federal holiday observed on the first Monday in September. The first Labor Day in the United States was celebrated on September 5, 1882 in New York City.^[1] It became a federal holiday in 1894, when, following the deaths of a number of workers at the hands of the U.S. military and U.S. Marshals during the Pullman Strike, President Grover Cleveland put reconciliation with the labor movement as a top political priority. Fearing further conflict, legislation making Labor Day a national holiday was rushed through Congress unanimously and signed into law a mere six days after the end of the strike.

The Pullman Strike was a nationwide conflict between labor unions and railroads that occurred in the United States in 1894. The conflict began in the town of Pullman, Illinois on May 11 when approximately 3,000 employees of the Pullman Palace Car Company began a wildcat strike in response to recent reductions in wages, bringing traffic west of Chicago to a halt. President Grover Cleveland ordered federal troops to Chicago to end the strike.

The strike was broken up by United States Marshals and some 12,000 United States Army troops, commanded by Nelson Miles, sent in by President Grover Cleveland on the premise that the strike interfered with the delivery of U.S. Mail, ignored a federal injunction and represented a threat to public safety. The arrival of the military and subsequent deaths of workers led to further outbreaks of violence. During the course of the strike, 13 strikers were killed and 57 were wounded. An estimated 6,000 rail workers did $340,000 worth of property damage (about $8,818,000 adjusted for inflation to 2010).

So yeah. As usual we Americans are celebrating a holiday that really should be a ‘memorial’ day. The death of 13 people in 1894 has somehow spun into a three day celebration of food and fun.

I like to think of Labor Day as the celebration of all the working folk who need this day to reflect on themselves for the fine, fine job they do during the year:

To the Dunkin’ Donuts clerk in Marlboro Mass: Asked for a medium hot coffee with just cream…asked “Would you like a straw?”

To the McDonalds employee in Anytown USA, who cannot count back change unless the machine prompts them.

To the Walmart employee in Cromwell Ct, who if she just crack a smile, remove the scowl, and stop being such a cranky butt – customers may be nicer to her and she may just like her job a little more.

To the clerk at your local convenient store, look I’m sorry it’s not convenient for you right now that I am here disturbing your phone call, text message, or whatever you are doing.. please just cash me out!

I salute you all!!! Happy Labor Day!

Messed Up Week

I’d like to start by apologizing for not blogging for the last two days. I had an unusual personal crisis and to be honest… I wasn’t in the mood.

But today is a new day…so let’s see if we can crank this up.

I sit here patiently waiting for UPS to deliver my books for school. Classes start Tuesday. Labor Day is Monday. Yeah…

Labor Day. I have found since being unemployed that holidays are starting to feel ‘meaningless’ to me. As a matter of fact, the weekends are just as meaningless. There is nothing to look forward to.

I remember at work, in January, the Company Holiday Calendar would be sent out and we’d start plotting out our vacation days around upcoming holidays. It was exciting. Even looking forward to the upcoming weekend was exciting; it sort of got you through the week. Now each day is the same. I’ll assume this is how it will be when (if ever) I retire.

Last week I was walking into Stop and Shop and ran into an acquaintance who said “Thank goodness it’s Friday” my response back was, “Every day is Friday to me”. I don’t know if he took that wrong, I was just trying to tell him I can’t tell the difference between days anymore. One blends into another and I actually have to stop and think what day it is.

Hmmm No UPS yet!

I’ve been thinking to myself… ‘Can you say… RUT?’

So today I signed up to volunteer via AARP. I don’t know if I’ll be accepted or not, I haven’t got that far into it, but they are looking for volunteers to take a five week course (1 day per week) and after the course you are able to instruct older people on Medicare sign up procedures and explain things to them. I figure it’ll be good for them AND good for me. I’ll know how to do it PRIOR to getting to the point where I’ll need it. I’ll keep you posted (no pun intended) on what happens.

Okay… so UPS just arrived, I tore open the carton and BEHOLD!! (insert lightning bolt sound here) The Beginning of My New Career was contained inside. I’m kind of nervous.

I’m taking two courses: International Management (which should be cake because the job I just left I dealt with Germany and Thailand on a regular basis… and we aren’t at war with them, so I must have done it correctly. The second course I’m taking is English Literature, I received three books for that class: O Pioneers!, (that sound pitifully boring) Never Let Me Go, and one that seems very appropriate for me: Brave New World!

And with that I am off...To start my new adventure… my new career! … My new life! Now if I can just make through the weekend…let’s see...laundry… grocery shopping… weeding….. and so on.

Top 31 Things Everyone Should Know

A while ago I was webbing and came across a list of twenty-five things everyone should know how to do. On the list included items like: “Be able to drive in reverse with a trailer in tow” or “Determine your direction with a watch and the sun.” I thought these were pretty cool tips… and of course I can’t find that list anywhere on the web now. So I’ve searched and found another list pretty similar and I’ve added a couple more below. So check it out, see if you are a well rounded human being! My abilities are also listed below…

Change a flat tire
Cure a hangover
Sew on a button
Clean your place in under 45 minutes
Whistle with your fingers
Order wine in a restaurant without getting stiffed
Remove common stains
Parallel park
Cook one "signature meal"
Jump-start a car
Wrap a present
Do the Heimlich maneuver
Open a champagne bottle
Take good pictures
Change a diaper
Carve a birthday cake
Help someone out of a car
Get a raise
Use a compass
Keep a plant alive for more than a year
Send a drink to someone's table
Finish a piece of furniture
Hold your liquor
Fold a fitted sheet
Write superior thank-you notes
Dance a "slow dance" without looking like an idiot
Start a fire
Hold a baby
Use a full place setting properly

Drive a Manual Transmission Vehicle

Handle a Hammer, Axe or Handsaw

Okay are you ready? Make Your Marks!!!! Mine are below…

Change a flat tire NO – Can’t get the lug nuts off
Cure a hangover NO – Suffer you bastard!
Sew on a button YES
Clean your place in under 45 minutes YES – 5 Minutes if they are in the driveway!
Whistle with your fingers NO
Order wine in a restaurant without getting stiffed NO
Remove common stains Yes with scissors.
Parallel park NO…I live in Connecticut we don’t parallel park..we have people!
Cook one "signature meal” Um…no
Jump-start a car what and have the battery blow up in my face?
Wrap a present But of course!
Do the Heimlich maneuver If I had to
Open a champagne bottle No
Take good pictures I think they are good. Others say they are blurry, look fine to me!
Change a diaper Been there …
Carve a birthday cake I never knew you CARVED a cake…so I’ll have to say No.
Help someone out of a car you mean besides opening the door and saying ‘get out!’ ?
Get a raise I’ve pissed enough people off in my life
Use a compass The direction kind? Or that pointy thing with the pencil?
Keep a plant alive for more than a year As long as it’s plastic, sure!
Send a drink to someone's table I do every night it’s called dinner
Finish a piece of furniture I would think I’d have to START one first.
Hold your liquor For how long?
Fold a fitted sheet I worked seven years at a laundry mat…
Write superior thank-you notes Yes
Dance a "slow dance" without looking like an idiot No
Start a fire Yes with a lighter…No rubbing sticks together
Hold a baby As long as I can give it back
Use a full place setting properly Yes.

Drive a Manual Transmission Vehicle I have a hard enough time with an automatic

Handle a Hammer, Axe or Handsaw Ouch..

So as you can see I have some work to do.

Unemployment People vs. the US Government

PLEASE READ THE FOLLOWING DISCLAIMER: In no way shape or form am I bashing the US Government / the State of Connecticut/ the Department of Labor or any other group I have not mentioned – EVERYONE I have met with / spoken to / or other methods of communicating have been helpful / courteous / polite.

I have been in the work force for over thirty-five years. I have paid my taxes, both Federal and State. I have followed all the ‘rules’ – I am a true blue American and proud of it. I never bash the government, I believe ‘if you don’t like it, get up off your ass and run for office and don’t even talk to me about it if you don’t vote’ and if that doesn’t work for you…move out! Go to oh...Let’s say... Iran, Iraq, Afghanistan, or any other troubled nation. I am sure they would be happy to have you. (I’ll save this topic of another time.)

Having worked for this length of time and having been so True Blue has apparently caused me to miss the training classes on the following topics:

How to Work the System;

How to Be Unemployed but Still Be Able to Shop;

And the ever popular...

How to Beat the System and Get Most of Your Bills Paid.

On Friday I thought I would be proactive and make a few phone calls. I called the Unemployment Office and was told my Federal Unemployment Extension was approved and I’m “all set”. I called the Fuel Assistance group and was told I didn’t qualify. I went on-line to see if I was eligible for food assistance and was informed I am eligible for $7.00 per month. Gee!

I want to be the unemployed person driving the new car!

I want to be unemployed and be able to shop at Target!

I want my pending heating bills paid!

I just want to know how those other people are doing it! It just doesn’t seem fair, I don’t know the system. And it's not my fault I was at work!!! No one will tell you the system either. It’s like a club or something. A secret society of the unemployed.

So if anyone knows when the next class is scheduled please let me know, my calendar is open.

And by the way… the person who told me Friday that I was “all set” was wrong… I couldn’t into my account on-line…couldn’t do it on the phone either… had to call and spend thirty seven minutes on hold waiting for a human.